Monday, January 19, 2009

"For the life of me, I cannot remember, what made us think we were wise and we'd never compromise..." -Verve Pipe, Freshman

I was going through my myspace account today, updating and changing things when I decided that I wanted to send a Hi comment to some of my friends. Being the lazy person that I am instead of going to their individual pages I went straight to my comments and starting to surf through and pick the people I'd say "hi" to. While I was doing this I learned that myspace keeps up to two years of comments which is awesome and second that I had some real random times with certain people back when I was college that I must say I do miss. I feel like after being home for two years that even those who live on the island with me I don't see that much. My life no longer revolves around school, friends, and feeding people and of course the green guy. Now my life revolves around teaching, night school, Pete, the gym and no little green guy. I kinda miss the days of Geneseo when I had a little bubble of my own to call home. I could do whatever I wanted with no care in the world with no need to worry about anyone but really myself. Now, it's a completely different story. I have to worry about my students, my family, my boyfriend, and a couple of my friends who I've kept close. I have to worry about myself too on top of all that, and I wonder why I gained the weight that I did. I've been stretch out too thin in terms of my needs but where can I do? Forget people and think about myself? Yeah right, for those of you who know me knows that that is impossible. I can't help think about people, even the ones who I haven't spoken to in years. My life is as complicated as ever and the only good thing that has come of it is having a 4.0 GPA for my masters program and a couple of friends who granted are MIA a lot but I least I know both of them are here on the island with me and I have a Pete. Granted, he is a pain in my ass and a lot of times I want to bitch slap him upside the head but if you take that away from the equation he does take good care of me and he does try at least not to be a butt head all the time.

However, even with that I still feel locked in a cage with my wings clipped since I've been home and I want to badly escape.

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